The first question, during my first meeting with my life coach (M. Zein- http://www.lifecoachingegypt.com/coach/15#.WMV3khLyuDU ), was: Why do think you need a life coach?
Now I am becoming a mature person and I think that I am not where I wanted to be, I said. I feel I cannot afford to make any “bad” decisions and consequently taking the wrong move that will take me to the wrong direction in life. I feel that my thinking is getting a little obscured after a conflicting situation with my supervisor that lasted over 4 years. Even though the situation was finally resolve, I am still carrying a fresh wound that needs some time to heal. In short, even though I am a life coach, I needed coaching to help me think right; I continued.
After few sessions, I felt I was taken to a journey of rediscovery and that I am getting acquainted with myself again. In the same time both of us, myself and Zein, were trying to get acquainted with each other. In our last session, we were discussing how to tackle social media using Facebook, blogging and other available online media to get some exposure to like-minded people. We came to discuss as to how would social media serve me and how can I make the content attractive to like-minded people/readership. We were bouncing few ideas; my coach came up the topic of mid-life crisis.
After we ended the session, I slept on the discussion and pondered on the rich session that needed some time to digest. Suddenly, it struck me. Am I passing through midlife crises? I had to do some reading, and o boy was I in for a surprise.
I have realized that midlife crisis is not a trivial issue, it is not about men going crazy as they grow old. It was an eye opener for me, that is why I decided to share this topic with you.
Definition: According to psychology today; midlife crises happens at the age 40 to 65. It affects males and females. Midlife crisis is associated with physiological/psychological changes that takes place in our lives and if not dealt with it can lead to mental illness. https://www.psychologytoday.com/conditions/midlife
A study of the Office for National Statistics (UK) found that people between 40-59 are the least satisfied and more anxious among other age brackets. Study also found that dissatisfaction with life can start as early as at 35 years of age. People aged 65-79 seemed to be happier. https://www.theguardian.com/society/2016/feb/02/middle-aged-people-least-happy-most-anxious-ons-wellbeing-report.
Without getting caught in definitions and studies; midlife crisis is a quite normal phase of life. We mostly follow the herd. We have been told that key to happiness is to get the best education we can afford, then start a career and work ourselves up the career ladder. Start a family then raise a kid or two and send them to school. Around and about our midlife; we come to a major junction or crossroads that forces us to take a little pause to do some serious thinking and even questioning life, ourselves and doubt the value of what we did and still doing. Well, I hate my job, the only reason I studied medicine is because my father wanted me to be a doctor like him. I don’t think I love my wife/husband, I am not sure I even love myself, I am not enjoying life, in short I am not happy, we tell ourselves.
We become to realize that we are no longer young, we are not old either. Our bodies are changing from inside where hormones play their own game, diabetes, blood pressure or other diseases find their way to us. From the outside, body parts getting saggy, wrinkles appear in the face only to remind us every time we look at the mirror “we are not young anymore”. We get slower as we move and think. Our sight is as not as sharp as it used to be, in fact we find ourselves reaching for reading glasses every time we want to read something. Men think they are becoming less handsome, women think they are becoming less attractive. Amidst all of that, the ever-growing pressure exerted by looking after the kids combined with very demanding careers, the pressure of bills, everything in life is pressing. The loss of job or going through divorce, a loss of a friend in the same age or one or both parents amplifies the situation and makes it look even worse.
In short midlife crisis is about inevitable changes in life. It is only the way we choose to deal and handle this change that would make it crisis or a journey of self-rediscovery or re-inventing oneself. You can choose to run after young ladies/lads just to prove to yourself that you are still in the game. You can also choose to peruse hobby that you liked when you were a kid and decide to join an art or dance class, or even buy this Harley motor bike that you always dreamed of when you were in your teens, but your parents refused to get it for you for whatever reason. Or you can choose to take a part of making this world a better place by helping others within the community, or helping the poor in South America, India or Africa.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UfvpJ6BCs9A
To cut the long story short, midlife crisis does not have to be so. If you are informed and prepared you can turn it into a breakthrough. Midlife crisis can be a very good opportunity to rediscover yourself and revive your passion. It is said that blissing has a very bad habit; it often shows up disguised as a mishap.
Feel Good 